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In my bi weekly class which meets
in Beverly, Ma, I am helping others succeed by helping them
"take themselves on." We address the Universal Laws of Success
and communication skills that help one "cut through the
blocks" on the path to success. Blocks that one usually cannot
see without help.
One student, who committed to
my program for 26 weeks, was kindly introduced to me by his
employer. His employer had agreed to pay for the program. I
interviewed the young man first to see if he was a fit for the
class. First and foremost we discussed what a commitment was,
that it meant he was giving his word that "no matter what" he
was sticking the class out for the 26 weeks. That even if he
felt out of place or uncomfortable in the beginning, he would
stay. With that out of the way, even though I had reservations
about his ability level, I allowed his entry into the program.
He attended the first few classes and did what I had asked.
"Not one word from you in the first few weeks," I had
requested. Then he did not appear for a few meetings. Then he
came for one more. Again after that he did not appear. In the
meantime, I had introduced him of course to my other clients
that are in the class and they knew of course what he was
selling. I, in fact did business with his company and I gave
him orders for his product during his time in the class and
even afterwards as well.
You may now know what happened.
I received an email from his boss saying "xxxx, will not be
making the class, it's not a fit for him." He could not face
me himself. He was breaking his word, and his employer was
helping him. Imagine in this Universe of "you get what you
give," giving that? Imagine as an employer, helping your
employees break their word? What does that say to the employee
about breaking their word? It sent him a message that not only
is it ok to break your word, the company will help you. What
did that say about the company and the employee to my other
clients? Would you recommend someone like that?
The employee, my student, was
uncomfortable in the class. What he was hearing did not fit,
"with what he wanted" or "the way he thought that things
should be done." Of course. He thought that he knew better. The
early classes did not fit with his idea of how to be trained
to sell. Imagine a rookie thinking he knew better. How could
anyone contribute to someone like that? He knew better than
someone selling successfully for over 30 years. One must learn about
"how they show up" before one can sell anything
successfully. Others see how you show up even when you cannot.
Learning what to say comes after learning how to "be." I
made him uncomfortable and he ran away.
That is one of the primary
blocks to success. He was uncomfortable and he ran away. That
is what is holding him back everywhere. I have another client,
whose company is running away from what is uncomfortable and
blaming everyone else around them. Whenever things go wrong,
they have a group of employees who want to blame everyone and
everything around them for their lack of success. Even the CEO
shies away from what is uncomfortable. The easiest thing to do
is to blame others instead of asking "what is my role in this"
and "what can I do now to make a difference." This is what we
all tend to do, run away from what is uncomfortable.
Nothing worthwhile in life is gained by avoiding what is
uncomfortable initially. Nothing.
My clients needed to stay and
face themselves, that is what they were seeing. They were
seeing the part of themselves that "breaks their word," that
"wants things their way" or denies responsibility in what is
happening. How can anyone contribute to someone who thinks
they know it all? How can anyone new break through old
patterns if they believe that "they have all the answers?"
These clients believe that they know better.
My teacher says "one must be
willing to be uncomfortable to have a future unlike the past."
Resist the comfortable. Resist
the urge to flee when you are uncomfortable. Feeling
uncomfortable is a sign that a bright new future awaits
you. It is a sign that you are going somewhere that you have
never been willing to go. This is exactly how to break the old
patterns of lack. Lack of success, lack of anything. Stay
uncomfortable.
This person and this company
are fleeing what is uncomfortable, they are fleeing their own
new future. Comfort keeps us stuck in whatever we are
currently getting. We need to be continually asking "What is
my role in this?" No matter what is going on in your life, you
have a role in it. In your company the same rule applies. You
can blame someone else and that makes you power - less to do
anything about it. Or, you can take responsibility and be
power - full, and then take action. Which one feels better
afterwards??
Keep your word, no matter what,
and stay uncomfortable.
Be well,
Steve
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